Im 18 dating a 32 year old
You are so right. I just turned 25 and I definitely am not even the same person I was at 19…. You have SO much life ahead of you. Always put yourself first. PinkPanther July 18, , 3: And like MissDre, I have also grown and changed a lot just in the past two years. TheOtherMe July 18, , 3: Rachelgrace53 July 19, , 3: JennyTalia July 18, , 3: I would leave his age out until after they meet him.
As Wendy said, let the relationship speak for itself. SpaceySteph July 18, , 3: And in fact have, though in that case I was the older one in the relationship by 3 years.
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I would prepare yourself for all manner of embarassing parent behaviors, as you should anytime you introduce a S. Quakergirl July 18, , 8: And even a basic conversational question with completely innocent intentions is likely to reveal a significant age difference. JennyTalia July 19, , 9: Sure there may be implications based on a conversation when referencing job or school or something, but they would wait until later and casually ask me his age. Princess Bananahammock July 18, , 3: Just keep your eyes open, LW.
Sometimes not always, but sometimes an older guy dates a younger girl because she will put up with stuff that an older, more experienced woman would not. His life may actually look pretty glamorous to an 18 year old. And, I completely agree with Wendy.
Budjer July 18, , 3: Be careful and mindful of his actions. TECH also touched on an important point. July 18, , 3: Greater chance of a difference in phases of lives. July 18, , 4: TheOtherMe July 18, , 4: G July 19, , 9: It is a little creepy, but a freaking hilarious story! TheOtherMe July 19, , Lexington July 18, , 8: Yozi July 18, , 3: But when she was on the other side of 21, she realized how different a 21 year old is from a 19 year old. It is a world of difference.
And knowing what she knew then she looked back on the relationship and felt taken advantage of. You may think that you are in a good relationship with a good man but then look back later and see it differently. A few years ago I found out that a coworker and friend of mine who is in his 30s had been married and divorced. See, this whole line of thought just depresses me. And what about then? SpaceySteph July 18, , 4: I just think you need to be prepared for you and your SO to change.
And when things do start changing, recognize that your relationship to evolve to suit the people you are becoming. I think it really depends on the person. Likewise you could wait until you are 30 to get married and still end up divorced a year later. While I agree that people change so much in their 20s, which is why it may not be a good idea to get married before you have a good idea of who you are as a person, it is possible for you to change and grow together with your partner.
I currently give percent to my partner but we know we want to wait to make a huge committment aka marriage until we are a little older. We are both 24 and know that we may change what we want, where we want to live, etc… in the next couple of years. I read that people change a lot until they are 30, and then they kind of coast. Christy July 18, , 7: But even with the mistakes, it was a great time and I would probably make a lot of the same choices again. Everyone is just cautioning not to make huge commitments or life-changing decisions it will be expensive or time consuming to get out of.
I got married at Was I young and stupid? Yes, you will grow and change as a person and so will your partner. G July 19, , I was going to bring up my Mom. She married my Dad when she was 19 and him Of course the 70s were a different time, but they were still VERY young. They have now been married for 35 plus years and I think still happy. It is possible for people to marry young and have it work.
I would just recommend like everyone else to be cautious. Realize what you might miss, LW. Try to make sure this guy is worth all the time you are giving him. Landygirl July 18, , 5: I think at any point in your life, you can look back and realize how things have changed, it never stops! Even now I look back at my 30s and think about how I would have done things differently if I only knew then what I know now. I think Wendy brings up a very good point.
Be prepared for this question and be prepared with a good answer. You will have to be prepared for some pushback at the beginning. Also remember that your parents distrust of your bf comes from a good place, namely their desire to protect you and keep you from harm. The best way to handle it is maturely- behave like their adult daughter capable of an adult relationship, not like a child. The moment you behave like a child you will reinforce their parental desire to protect you from the big bad man.
Vathena July 18, , 3: Agreed with all of the above! I started dating my husband when I was 26 and he was SpyGlassez July 19, , 1: My college roommate was 20 when she started dating the then year-old guy who has been her husband for the last 9 years. AnitaBath July 18, , 3: My initial plan was to tell her I was seeing a guy, be vague on the details, and after a few more months so we ourselves could gauge the seriousness of our relationship I would tell my mom his age. About another five or six months went by, until I got rear ended right by his house and had to come clean again.
She was still extremely disapproving, but at least this time she was accepting. My dad actually took it better than anyone. I waited for her to bring up meeting him before I invited him over for dinner. Ever since she met him, my mom has loved my boyfriend. Since most people viewed it negatively, it really had me down. Seriously, you know the one. We try to minimize any imbalances as much as possible.
Just something to think about. Oh, and most importantly, be prepared for her to flip out. Or, at the very least, get a little bug eyed. Because, really, I do just fine for myself in all other aspects. AnitaBath July 18, , 4: You are incredibly intelligent, well-spoken and mature for a person of your age, and I think this has strongly contributed to the success of your relationship.
Is a 33 year old guy and an 18 year old girl dating weird?
Mothers are scary that way. It gets a little weird. Slamy July 18, , 5: TheOtherMe July 18, , 5: Just when I finished typing this, I accidentally called my mom. Or my phone called her. One time, I was on a flight back from a business trip and felt like something was wrong with my mom.
I kept telling that to my business partner during the whole flight. As soon as I saw him I asked if something was wrong with my mom. Sarah July 18, , 3: I could be wrong, but that is exactly the wrong kind of lingo for establishing that this relationship is healthy. I felt very protective of her. LTC July 18, , 4: Sarah July 18, , 4: Budjer July 18, , 4: Renee July 18, , 4: Young men do have maturity issues.
Renee July 18, , 7: Schwinny July 18, , 4: Why the rush to meet the parents? If you have not been together all that long, there is no real rush for introductions. In fact, I would recommend you wait a while to see how your relationship develops. Start with friend introductions first and work up to family introductions once both you are ready. Also, as others have said, you do not have to declare his age to your parents or anyone else. There is no reason to lie to anyone but you do not have to invite everyone to criticise the age difference right from the start.
Let them ask if there is a concern. Having been in your position once at 18 and again now since I was 31 , I can tell you that there is a big difference in how that age gap really works, but a lot of it depends on the individuals not the age gap. Back then, both of us were worried about appearances and it was crippling.
In this relationship, we had the conversation initially and decided to see what happened. Occasionally, we trade barbs about who remembers what Him: Do you remember TAB cola?
Yeah, my dad used to drink it. You can maybe get away with that with more distant relatives which, actually, my mom has suggested to me , but I highly doubt that tactic will work on parents. Jshizzle July 18, , 8: Quakergirl July 18, , 9: For the record, when my brother met Quakerboy he guessed he was 23— in reality he had just turned 18 and I was I can only imagine the freakout if he had thought he was in his late 20s or early 30s.
She may be living at home which could be why the introduction is being rushed. If that is the case and her friends all meet this guy the word will get around to her parents that she is dating a 30 year old man regardless if she wants it to or not. And if she tries to keep it a secret, one day, her mom might be driving by and see her making out with him when she should be in school… Ouups! MissDre July 18, , 9: When we first started dating a little over a year ago my mom freaked out and wanted to know what the hell a 30 year old man wanted with a 24 year old girl.
I told her to chill out. AKchic July 18, , 4: Any assaults, domestic violence, etc? Any of them against family members, females, girlfriends and especially, mothers of his children if he has any? Does he have any younger siblings, and do you know them? Have you heard any family stories from them? Do they jive with his versions of events? Questions 1, 2, and 3 could have saved me a lot of hassle, and will save you a lot if you choose to employ them prior to making any big decisions with him. Other than that, if he checks out, I wish you luck. It just depends on the maturity levels of both parties.
If your parents balk, you could always remind them that years ago, it was common practice for fathers to promise their 15 year old daughters to 30 year old men. July 18, , 5: LW — I am 10 years younger than my husband but act 10 years older than him. It was hard for my mom to understand the relationship at first, but I did pretty much exactly what Wendy suggested — I introduced him as himself, not as his age.
But I also agree with the rest of the commenters — take it slow. You will change SO much in the next few years. And if you find that you are growing into a person who still works with this man, well great! I waited for a few years before my husband and I married just for that reason.
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Elrig July 18, , 4: He'll be a total lad. Admittedly a slightly paedophilic lad, but a lad all the same. Report 7 years ago 3. Report 7 years ago 4. As a guy, go for it lol However if I was a girl, no way. Report 7 years ago 5. Lets put it this way, if I was 31 I would definitely go out of my way to bang an 18 year old. Report 7 years ago 6. It's a bit odd, but in the end if she's beating treated well by him and they're both happy, who is anybody to judge? Report 7 years ago 7. It makes sense looking at it from a distance. Men - attracted to healthy females.
An year-old girl is usually healthy even if she isn't what might be considered "drop dead gorgeous". Women - usually want a man to "look up" to. There's probably precious few 18 year olds for your friend to look up to. But I could be wrong. Report 7 years ago 8. This is about the age my dad was when he met my mum and she was 18 as well Report 7 years ago 9.
Original post by Anonymous What's your opinion of an 18 year old girls first boyfriend being 31? Report 7 years ago It's fine, they're both consenting and both adults. Any relationship could end in tears, whether they have an age gap or not, if they're happy then I don't see an issue. Just make sure she's knows you're there if it goes wrong I'm a little old 23 and seeing a 31 yo and our mentalities are pretty much the same.
Dear Wendy: “I’m 18 and My Boyfriend is 30”
She's 18, whatever floats her boat. May go well, may not. You live and you learn. Let her experiance life the way she sees best, its really her choice. It's legal and everything but they would be so different in terms of life experience. If they are happy together theres no problem with it really. I know of much bigger age gaps in relationships than that. All guys aged 30 and below are an emotional and financial wreck these days and mentally twisted so it makes sense to choose a life partner who is more mature and maturity comes with age.
If it's just a bit of fun sex etc I don't see the issue. At 18 she could join the army end of the day. I would say though, that if the relationship got serious there could be problems further down the line. And not just with close minded people, he might be still quite young looking now,but in ten years time he probably won't be.
As well as that ,while boys her age might be a bit immature right now,I would say that what an 18 yr old girl likes to do socially will be much different to what a 30 yr old might want. Personally I think any bloke older than 25 is a bit old to be honest for a relationship with an 18 yr old.